Sunday, November 20, 2011
Through the Distance
They say, to never engage yourself in a long distance relationship (LDR) because it's really hard, and that it's just most likely to end, if not soon, somewhere in the future.
I, myself, am engaged in a Long Distance Relationship. And yes, it is hard in so much ways.
I never imagined myself being in an LDR because I knew already before about the mishaps. But true is what they say, that when you fall in love, most of the time you wouldn't even consider your "requirements" for you partner. Then and there, you find the perfect person to love, and you just find yourself falling in love.
Yes, I did have doubts at the start. I was afraid that the fairy tale would turn into a nightmare. I didn't know if I could put my whole trust into my new found knight in shining armor especially that my heart has once been scared already.
Clearing up my throat and trusting everything to faith, love, and most especially God, I took up the courage to love again despite knowing the fact that I'm entering an LDR.
It all went out right at first. But as time came, I came to realize how hard it really was.
I really despised the times when he couldn't be there for me when I needed him the most. I'd find myself crying alone and going through my personal problems without having anyone to hug me tight and wipe my tears.
I ended up doubting every move he made. I became paranoid thinking that he was cheating on me and keeping things from me. I kept on comparing him with the boyfriends of my friends who were also in LDR. My friends would tell me the awful things they boyfriends or exes do/did and I'd think that he's doing the same to me too.
He was always busy with work and we seldom get to call or text each other since he was the new kid at work so most of the hard stuff were given to him.
I was blessed with a partner who was so patient of me. He never gave up on us and made it a point to fix all our misunderstandings. Whenever I wanted to let go he'd always remind me that there was always something better to hold on to. He constantly found ways to show me that I could trust him and that he would never do anything to destroy our relationship.
So as time went by, I learned to become stronger. I learned to put more faith on our relationship. We had less fights, and I was able to endure the distance between us and take it as an opportunity to have more time for myself and other people and things. In short, I loved US.
I got to learn how to love alone time. With this, I was able to appreciate myself more. I got to learn more of my abilities and even got to engage in different activities that have developed me mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. And the best thing was that it taught me to become more independent.
I had a lot of family time that I learned more of the value we Filipinos have regarding family-ties. I got to know my relatives more and got to enjoy more their company instead of worrying about my partner all the time.
I became more appreciative of my friends. I was blinded before by the thought that I never had anyone. But I realized then that I was just hindering myself to get to know my friends more; to be closer to them.
Also, it gave me time to develop my career as I had time to concentrate more on my future. But, of course, never leaving him out of the picture.
The best thing about LDR is when you develop that feeling of missing each other. That when the opportunity comes for you to see each other again, you feel that tingly feeling, the excitement, and the joy you have inside. When you see each other, it's as if there ain't no more tomorrow. Then you cherish your time together more knowing that you've missed each other so much. The time not spent together gives you an opportunity to be surprised of the wonders your relationship can do.
Long distance relationships aren't as hard as it may seem. Especially now that communication and transportation is much easier than before. It's just the matter of maintaining the love or making it even better. For when you truly love a person, distance is just a factor, but it will never define your relationship. It is love that defines it.